Mullah Nasruddin’s (also known as Nasruddin Hoja) stories are famous all over the world. Nobody knows the real history of this person. Some say he was an Afghan, other claim his origins to Turkey and yet others say he was from Iran….. Given below are a few stories taken from various sources around the world. They are fun and interesting and if we think deeply, some of them have a philosophical meaning. None of these are my original stories and I have made no such claims either. These are just collected in one place for you to enjoy and understand this great folk character….
Who’s to Blame
Mullah Nasruddin and his wife came home one day to find the house burgled. Everything portable had been taken away. “It’s all your fault,” said his wife, “for you should have made sure that the house was locked before we left.” The Neighbor took up the chant: “You did not lock the windows,” said one. “Why did you not expect this?” said another. “The locks were faulty and you did not replace them,” said a third. “Just a moment,” said Nasruddin, “surely I am not the only one to blame?” “And who should we blame?” they shouted. “What about the thieves?” said Nasruddin. “Are they totally innocent?”
Saifu An angry man came in to a cafe and yelled:” IS SAIFU HERE?”. No body answered so he yelled again: IS SAIFU HERE OR NOT? Finally a guy got up, “YEAH, I AM SAIFU” he said, the angry man came closer and punched the guy, knocked him down on the floor and then left the cafe. The guy got up, cleaned his nose from blood and while every one was expecting a reaction from him, returned to his table without saying anything. Some one came and asked the guy: “How can you just sit here and do nothing? that man knocked you down and you are not even cursing him.” “You wouldn’t say that if you knew what I have done to him” said the man with a smirk. “What? How?” asked the other man with curious excitement. “I am not SAIFU” said the guy proudly.
The Perfect Partner
“One afternoon, Nasruddin and his friend were sitting in a cafe, drinking tea, and talking about life and love. “How come you never got married, Nasruddin?” asked his friend at one point. “Well,” said Nasruddin, “to tell you the truth, I spent my youth looking for the perfect woman. In Cairo, I met a beautiful and intelligent woman, with eyes like dark olives, but she was unkind. Then in Baghdad, I met a woman who was a wonderful and generous soul, but we had no interests in common. One woman after another would seem just right, but there would aways be something missing. Then one day, I met her. She was beautiful, intelligent, generous and kind. We had everything in common. In fact she was perfect.” “Well,” said Nasruddin’s friend, “what happened? Why did not’t you marry her? Nasruddin sipped his tea reflectively. “Well,” he replied, “it’s a sad thing. Seems she was looking for the perfect man.”
People often judge you by your external appearance
Nasruddin heard that there was a banquet being held in the nearby town, and that everyone was invited. He made his way there as quickly as he could. When the Master of Ceremonies saw him in his ragged cloak, he seated him in the most inconspicuous place, far from the great table where the most important people were waiting on hand and foot. Nasruddin saw that it would be an hour at last before the waiters reached where he was sitting. So he got up and went home. He dressed himself in a magnificent sable cloak and turban and returned to feast. As soon as the heralds of the Emir, his host, saw this splendid sight they started to beat the drum of welcome and sound the trumpets in amener befitting a visitor of high rank. The Chamberlain came out of the palace himself, and conducted the magnificent Nasruddin to a place almost next to the Emir. A dish of wonderful food was immediately placed before him. Without a pause, Nasruddin began to rub handfuls of it into his turban and cloak. “Your Eminence,” said the prince, “I am curious as to your eating habits, which are new to me.” “Nothing special,” said Nasruddin; “the cloak get me in here and got me the food. Surely it deserves it portion.”
Practice what you preach
Once a renowned philosopher and moralist was traveling through Nasruddin’s village when he asked him where there was a good place to eat. He suggested a place and the scholar, hungry for conversation, invited Mullah Nasruddin to join him. Much obliged, Mullah Nasruddin accompanied the scholar to a nearby restaurant, where they asked the waiter about the special of the day. “Fish! Fresh Fish!” replied the waiter. “Bring us two,” they answered. A few minutes later, the waiter brought out a large platter with two cooked fish on it, one of which was quite a bit smaller than the other. Without hesitating, Mullah Nasruddin cooked the larger of the fish and put in on his plate. The scholar, giving Mullah Nasruddin a look of intense disbelief, proceed to tell him that what he did was not only blatantly selfish, but that it violated the principles of almost every known moral, religious, and ethical system. Mullah Nasruddin calmly listened to the philosopher’s extempore lecture patiently, and when he had finally exhausted his resources, Mullah Nasruddin said, “Well, Sir, what would you have done?” “I, being a conscientious human, would have taken the smaller fish for myself.” “And here you are,” Mullah Nasruddin said, and placed the smaller fish on the gentleman’s plate.
Judging a person’s knowledge
The wit and wisdom of Mullah Nasruddin never leaves him tongue-tied. One day an illiterate man came to Mullah Nasruddin with a letter he had received. “Mullah Nasruddin, please read this letter to me.” Mullah Nasruddin looked at the letter, but could not make out a single word. So he told the man. “I am sorry, but I cannot read this.” The man cried: “For shame, Mullah Nasruddin ! You must be ashamed before the turban you wear (i.e. the sign of education)” Mullah Nasruddin removed the turban from his own head and placed it on the head of the illiterate man, said: “There, now you wear the turban. If it gives some knowledge, read the letter yourself.”
You get what you need
As Nasruddin emerged form the mosque after prayers, a beggar sitting on the street solicited alms. The following conversation followed: Are you extravagant? asked Nasruddin. Yes Nasruddin. replied the beggar. Do you like sitting around drinking coffee and smoking? asked Nasruddin. Yes. replied the beggar. I suppose you like to go to the baths everyday? asked Nasruddin. Yes. replied the beggar. …And maybe amuse yourself, even, by drinking with friends? asked Nasruddin. Yes I like all those things. replied the beggar. Tut, Tut, said Nasruddin, and gave him a gold piece. A few yards farther on. another beggar who had overheard the conversation begged for alms also. Are you extravagant? asked Nasruddin. No, Nasruddin replied second beggar. Do you like sitting around drinking coffee and smoking? asked Nasruddin. No. replied second beggar. I suppose you like to go to the baths everyday? asked Nasruddin. No. replied second beggar. …And maybe amuse yourself, even, by drinking with friends? asked Nasruddin. No, I want to only live meagerly and to pray. replied second beggar. Whereupon the Nasruddin gave him a small copper coin. But why, wailed second beggar, do you give me, an economical and pious man, a penny, when you give that extravagant fellow a sovereign? Ah my friend, replied Nasruddin, his needs are greater than yours.
Who’s the Fool
Nasruddin used to stand in the street on market-days, to be pointed out as an idiot. No matter how often people offered him a large and a small coin, he always chose the smaller piece. One day a kindly man said to him: Nasruddin, you should take the bigger coin. Then you will have more money and people will no longer be able to make a laughing stock of you. That may be true, said Nasruddin, but if I always take the larger, people will stop offering me money to prove that I am more idiotic than they are. Then I would have no money at all.
Once, when Mullah Nasruddin was visiting a Western town, he was invited to attend a fashion show. He went, and afterwards he was asked how he liked it. “It’s a complete swindle!” he exclaimed indignantly. “Whatever do you mean?” he was asked. “They show you the women – and then try to sell you the clothes!”
Nasruddin was ferrying a traveler across a lake. As they spoke on various subjects, Nasruddin made a minor grammatical error. The traveler remarked, “You who wears a turban and calls himself a Mulla—have you ever studied grammar extensively?”
“No,” Nasruddin admitted, “I have not covered that subject in depth.”
“Well then,” the traveler replied,” you have wasted half of your life!”
Several minutes later, Nasruddin turned to the traveler and asked, “Have you ever learned how to swim?”
“No,” the traveler responded.
“Well then,” Nasruddin replied, “you have wasted all your life—for there is a hole in the boat, and we are sinking!”